Wednesday, March 25, 2009

Perimenopause: A Natural Nuisance

I guess we'll just have to accept the fact that the Google ads for this post will probably be a little gauche. When I decided to do the ad thing, I really didn't give much thought to what they would show, until I learned they were content related (although I've never figured out what wrinkled skin has to do with gardening). I've had to put several sites into the "blocked" list so they don't appear, but none of those were too bad, more ignorant than anything, at least they were to me. But I digress. . . .

I'd like to take this opportunity to talk about women. Now I know that there's way too much stuff to talk about when one talks about women, so I've decided to narrow my topic a bit. If you read the title of this post (and how could you not?), you already know what's about to be discussed. But don't worry ladies, and men, I'm even going to narrow it down more than that. Basically, what I want to talk about is: Hot.

No, I'm not talking about the adjective hot used to describe attractive women and/or men and other things, I'm talking about a physiological condition a lot of perimenopausal women know as hot flashes. And guys, let me tell you, they're really hot. I know. It's like being next to a human heater. Sometimes I think my wife is combustible.

Writing in the March 2009 issue of RDH, dental hygienist Kelli Swanson Jaecks gives us a vivid description of what she endured one night: "Sweat soaked sheets. Sweat beading on my brow and breasts. Sweat running in rivers through the valleys of my flesh. I woke, drenched in sweat and hotter than hell." I'll never complain about male pattern baldness again!

Even though you might think you've been "educated" on a particular subject (my minor was Women's Studies) something will invariably serve as a reminder that it's just been an exercise in sciolism. And I ultimately surrender to the notion that I'll never understand the arcana of women.

But I'm wondering if I should keep a fire extinguisher close to the bed, just in case one of those hot flahes gets a little too hot.

Hot

11 comments:

tina said...

TC, you are a smart man indeed. And you used another word I do not know! I do now. Can you guess which one it is? I say no to the fire extinguisher unless your wife has a very good sense of humor.

Susie said...

Before I address this post can you tell me how to block certain ads. I have some on my site that I'm not crazy about.

Okay, as far as hot flashes and night sweats go I know all about these little bouts of "hell" as you put it.

Let me tell you there is nothing like waking up in the middle of the night and water running off of every inch of your body from the body temp going up to who knows what. Then when you get you to dry off your sheets are wet and cold(especially in winter).

I don't know about your wife but I can tell you exactly when a hot flash is going to occur. I get a crazy feeling in my abdomen that works its way up to my head. At that point if I don't shed a layer I will have a layer of sweat.

Okay I reckon I have said enough about this lovely subject. It's time for bed and maybe I'll make it thru without wet sheets!!!

Terri said...

I think a wise man would hold off on any use of the fire extinguisher, for fear of finding himself "boatine" off alone!

Jennifer Suarez said...

I must admit, somtimes I'm TERRIFIED to get older for reasons just like this.

Skeeter said...

I now take a "Happy pill" as my hubby calls it to keep me in line. I am no longer the Wife from Hell nor the Heater of the sheets. Well, we better not go any further on the bedroom talk. Some things need to remain behind closed doors... ;-)

raccoonlover1963 said...

Hi TC
I'm definitely in trouble then. I haven't reached that stage in my life quite yet, although I'm 46. I have been that way all my life. When I was a child, I lived with my grandmother for a few years. In the dead of winter, I had to have the bedroom window open while I slept because I would overheat so badly. My husband loves it. He calls me his human electric blanket! I personally hate it!
Take care
Lisa

JulenaJo said...

Your post made me smile because you are so sensitive to your wife and understanding. Too bad more spouses aren't! I read the whole post with a smile until I got to the photo of you standing next to your wife. Or was that a bonfire? hahaha Then I laughed out loud. Thanks for sharing!

walk2write said...

Only good thing about the flu: you get cold chills that will take the edge off those hot flashes. Seriously, I have not experienced them, or if I have, I thought it was just another benefit of living in FL. You know, males have their own version of menopause. Care to tell us about it, TC?

TC said...

Ms. Tina: Was it sciolism?

Ms. Susie: Did you see my post about how to block certain ads?

Ms. Terri: I was on a sub in the Navy where "boatine" was a regular occurrence.

Ms. Jennifer: Me too!

Skeeter: Hooray! for "Happy pills!"

Ms. Lisa: In winter, my wife is my electric blanket. Only there' no way for me to turn the thermostat down.

Ms. JulenaJo: Thanks for stopping by and taking the time to say a few words. I'm glad I was able to make you smile.

W2W: No, I'll not mention that till I come up with a neologism you'll not be able to understand. ;~P

Frances said...

Hi TC, we all have our stories on this topic. Here is mine. During the coldest days last winter, not that long ago, our heater went awol. I kept putting on more clothes, socks, hats, etc. as that is not unusual for me. I never even look at the thermostat anymore for my internal one is broken. My husband came home from work and excleimed that the house was freezing. And didn't I know that? No, I didn't. I just figured, as we all say, it was just me.
Frances

TC said...

Ha ha ha!! Sorry, but that's hilarious Ms. Frances. ;~)